THE PINKY SPECIALIST
I think I would have made a great doctor. The only issue that probably would have held me back as a doctor is I have always been a little bit lazy. Doctors have to work hard and they have to know a lot of stuff.
Sometimes I think maybe I could have been a podiatrist. They only have to know about feet. How hard could that be? Feet? They are really not that complicated. But then…
There is hammer toe, bunions, flat feet, toe nail problems, arch problems; I would probably even have to know about ankles and stuff. There are a lot of bones in feet and every one of them can cause problems and require different treatments.
A podiatrist might have been a bit much for me. Still, I think I would have made a great doctor. Maybe I could have just narrowed down my practice.
If I had it to do over again, I would have become a doctor. I would have been pinky specialist. What are there; three bones and a nail? I could have easily learned everything there is to know about the pinky. You don’t put a broken pinky bone in a cast; you just wrap it with a popsicle stick and some duct tape. A cut pinky hardly ever needs stiches; generally a band aide will do. If as a doctor you screw up it is only a pinky. People can do just fine without a pinky. A pinky specialist does not have that much pressure.
It is too late for me to go back and start a new career. It’s too bad. I think I would have been a great Pinky Specialist.
Dr. Cranky “Pinkies R Us”