MY NEW LAPTOP
I wasn’t going to mess with Microsoft’s instructions so I left the computer alone even though I was anxious to play with my new toy.
Forty minutes later the last of the forty-nine updates were completed and I was instructed to restart the computer. On the restart I was told to wait while files were reconfigured. That message then disappeared and the screen did nothing, displayed nothing, and the little arrow was nowhere to be found.
Fifteen minutes later and there was no change. Frustrated, I pushed the off button. I turned the computer back on….still the screen did nothing displayed nothing and the arrow was still missing.
Mrs. Cranky, already tired of my whining (that's whinging for my UK and Aussie friends) about problems with the sensitive touchpad and not finding my files, sensed I was about to explode from frustration.
“Relax; I’m sure it is alright.”
“RELAX!! The friggin fragging frumping thing is one day old and they got to mess with updating shit and now I got nothing!”
“It’s fine, just do a restart.”
“I friggin fraggin frumping did a power down and still it’s not responding.”
“Pull the power cord and remove the battery.”
I did as I was told, popping the battery out for three seconds and then powering up again. Still the screen did not respond. NOTHING!
“That’s it, I’m taking it to the “Geek Squad” and they better not have to send it away or I am going to freak out!”
“I’m coming with you. When you go all rag ass on people they never help you out!”
We pulled in to Best Buy and headed straight for the Geek Squad desk.
“Can I help you?”
“Yes, I just bought this frumping machine yesterday. This morning Microsoft updated forty-nine programs and the friggin fraggin frumping thing has not responded since.”
“Hmmm…can I try it?”
“Suit yourself” I said and handed the PC to the Geek.
He opened the laptop up and noted the lit-up non-responding screen. He then pushed the off button, waited twenty seconds and pressed the power button again.
“We already did that. We even pulled the battery to shut off all power.”
As I said “power,” the computer came to life and was ready to go to work.
“Sir, to power down you need to hold the power button down until the blue lit ring goes out. Even pulling the battery does not immediately shut down the machine; you need to give it several seconds.”
“Is that in the instructions?”
“Yes Sir, it is.”
Getting along with the new computer is going to take some time.