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Sunday, November 20, 2011

HEADLINES 112011

It’s Sunday, time for more of Cranky’s HEADLINES complete with my sophomoric stupid comments.  GO ahead, skip this post, I’m going to keep doing it every week anyway!

HEADLINES 112011

Christian Baker Faces Boycott For Refusing to Make Lesbian Cake – Claims he can make Angel food cake, and Devil’s food cake, but was never taught how to make a Lesbian Cake.

Johnson & Johnson Starts Removing Toxins From Baby Products – Touts new product as the “No more tears or mucus dripping, cancerous sores Baby shampoo.”

Netflix Subscribers Offered Part of $27.5M Settlement With Wal-Mart at Less Than $1Each

- Or subscribers may view 25 minutes of any movie of their choice for free.

New Report Claims Britain’s Kate Middleton Is Pregnant – Justin Bieber is keeping quiet.

"Suck it up," defense chief tells Congress – Same instruction Clinton gave to his intern.

West says Iran deceives world on nukes – Also asserts that bears shit in the woods and claims the Pope is Catholic!

15 Infant Dinosaurs Discovered Crowded in Nest – Justin Bieber is keeping quiet.

Toronto School Bans Footballs, Soccer Balls and Baseballs From Playground – Hop-scotch ruled politically incorrect by Principal MacDonald, Jacks are outlawed as potential weapons; Tag is still allowed, but NO RUNNING! 

Mouse-Stomping High-Heeled German Women Convicted For Perverse Video – WOW, how perverted is that?   GERMAN women? That’s just wrong.

Man Arrested for Boosting Butts With Cement, Fix-A-Flat – Woman with flat ass, gets fat ass, and becomes a hard ass!

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