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Sunday, October 30, 2011

HEADLINES 10-30

HEADLINES 10-30


It’s Sunday, time for Cranky’s weekly silly headlines and my stupid sophomoric comments.  In two months these posts have received zero comments.  I interpret that as unanimous approval of these posts.  Therefore I submit this week’s HEADLINES:

Louisiana Gov. Bobby Jindal Re-Elected in a Landslide – Governor survives and vows to stay away from mountainsides next election.

Hundreds of Indian Girls Named 'Unwanted' Choose New Names Surprisingly, many chose Bashardi Bisichi or Hindi for “Bastard Bitch”.

Judge finalizes Milian-Dream divorce – What is a “Dream” divorce? Did Milian’s wife just leave the country?

Utah Mom Admits Trying to Sell Girl's Virginity – Mom tries the George Castanza defense, “Was that wrong? I never know for sure about these things, if knew that was wrong I wouldn’t have done it. No one ever told me that was wrong”


Woman allegedly stabbed by sometime-lover – Allegedly? Come on, was she stabbed or not?

Father of actress Lindsay Lohan arrested in Tampa – Michael Lohan arrested for impregnating Mrs. Lohan with Lindsey.

Face transplant recipient grants first interview – Demands cameras only show her best side.  I’m sorry, that’s why I’m going to hell.

Commonwealth Realms Agree to Abolish Royal Sex Discrimination – Common ordinary sex discrimination is still acceptable

Oops! School sign spelled wrong in South Florida school district – Superintendant insists regardless of this error, his school is one of the ”finest Instatooshuns in the entyre State.”

Woman guilty of trying to burn husband to death during nap – Woman says, “Next time I plan to set him on fire when I’m awake!”

Connecticut not sneaking up on anybody this season – Relieved, New York, New Jersey and Massachusetts drop their guard.

1 comment:

  1. Woman allegedly stabbed by sometime-lover – Allegedly? Come on, was she stabbed or not?

    i was thinking the exact, same thing!! how can one be "allegedly" stabbed? you either are stabbed, or you're not stabbed. it's not both, lol.

    -ronetta

    ReplyDelete

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